πŸ“° News
Apple is creating an AI chatbot called "Apple GPT," but they have no clue what to do with it. Maybe they could make it tell dad jokes or roast the competition! Knowing Apple, they'll probably find a way to make it prettier than all the other chatbots out there.
Did you hear about the two-faced star, Janus? Apparently, it's so confused that one side is made of hydrogen and the other side is made of helium. Talk about an identity crisis! Maybe it's just going through its rebellious teenage phase.
Wow, the Cybertruck has a small issue with looking like complete garbage? I guess Tesla decided to take the phrase "it's what's on the inside that counts" a little too literally. And to think, Elon Musk had the audacity to call it a futuristic marvel. More like a futuristic eyesore!
Meta releases Llama 2, a more β€˜helpful’ set of text-generating models. These llamas are trained on two trillion tokens, or as I like to call them, "llama food." They come in different sizes, from 7 billion parameter llamas to the fancy 70 billion parameter ones. But watch out for their biases, they tend to use "he" pronouns more than "she," just like my Uncle Bill. And they have a Western skew, probably from watching too many cowboy movies. Yeehaw!
Seems like Microsoft is giving businesses a steep price to pay for Copilot, their AI-powered Office documents. $30 per user per month? Talk about highway robbery! I guess even Office apps are trying to become high-end fashion brands. Maybe they'll start selling gold-plated keyboards next.
Netflix is making some savvy money moves, like ditching the basic plan and forcing people to fork over more cash. Plus, they implemented paid sharing rules, because why share for free when you can make people pay? Next thing you know, they'll charge extra to watch shows at peak hours. Greedy, but genius!
Well, well, well, it looks like Netflix is cutting back on the perks. They're axing their basic ad-free plan in the US and UK. I guess they figured they needed some extra cash to fund all those original shows about serial killers and dysfunctional families. Don't worry, though, they still have the ad-supported plan. Because who doesn't love watching a show and being interrupted by a commercial for toothpaste or laundry detergent? It's like a little reminder that capitalism is always watching. But hey, at least they lowered the prices in some other countries. So now you can get a great deal on all those hours you'll spend binge-watching instead of being productive. I mean, who needs money for groceries or bills when you have the entire Netflix catalog at your fingertips, right? So go ahead and enjoy those new entry prices, my friends. And remember, when life gets tough, just escape into the world of streaming. It's cheaper than therapy and you can still cry your eyes out to fictional characters.
Ah, the birth of id Software. A floppy disk, a parody of Super Mario Bros. 3, and the discovery of horizontal scrolling. It's like a comedic version of a tech thriller. Who needs Nintendo when you have fan letters from mysterious guys in Garland, Texas? This is comedy gold!
It looks like the world of mobile gaming is taking a page out of the gambling industry's playbook. Tricks like loss aversion, price anchoring, and false scarcity are being used to keep players hooked and spending. I guess it's not just your savings account at risk, but also your virtual village in CoinMaster!
☠️ Postmortem of the day
Network saturation in AWS's traffic gateways caused packet loss. An attempt to scale up caused more issues.
πŸ’‘πŸ“š Articles
Why did the car refuse to hang out with the bicycle and the motorcycle? Because it adheres to the Interface Segregation Principle, and only wants to associate with interfaces that are relevant to its needs! #ProgrammerJokes
Partition Pruning: Optimizing Query Performance with Table Partitioning in PostgreSQL.
Routing algorithms, they're like traffic cops for the internet, making sure requests are directed to the right servers. Round-robin is like a rotating sushi conveyor belt, everyone gets a turn. Weighted round-robin is like giving the bigger servers VIP treatment. The least connections algorithm is like sending requests to the least popular party. The least response time algorithm is all about speed dating for servers. Least bandwidth routing is like trying to find the server with the lowest data usage, I hope it's not binge-watching cat videos. And hashing routing is like giving each request a secret code to find their server buddy. #TechHumor
Ah, the joys of software migrations. It's like trying to move a family of elephants from one zoo to another without causing chaos. But hey, let's make it even more fun by calling it a "migration" instead of what it really is – a system-wide code refactoring extravaganza!Now, I have to admit, calling it a migration is a bit misleading. I mean, it's not like you're herding a flock of geese from one pond to another. No, no, no. This is more like trying to change all the RPC clients of service A to service B in a distributed system. Talk about a headache!But fear not, my friend. There are some principles I've observed when it comes to steering these migration efforts. And one of them is the importance of strong ownership. You need someone in charge who actually understands the consequences of this undertaking. Otherwise, it's like entrusting a toddler with a chainsaw. Disaster waiting to happen.Oh, and let's not forget about the uneven outcomes of migrations. Sure, the provider or platform team might be giddy with excitement about the benefits of the newer solution – faster latencies, larger datasets, compliance risk mitigation. But what about the poor customer teams who couldn't care less about all that? They just want stuff to work! Can we blame them? I mean, who wants to deal with more headaches?And speaking of headaches, the sheer amount of work involved in these migrations is enough to make your head spin. It's like trying to juggle flaming torches while riding a unicycle blindfolded. Not exactly a walk in the park. But here's a pro tip for you – less work means less contention. So, if you can find a way to automate the migration process and make it less painful for everyone involved, you're golden.Now, I know urgency is important. But let's not rush things, shall we? Long-lived migrations introduce chaos and uncertainty into the system, like that time I tried to build a self-driving lawnmower and ended up mowing down my neighbor's prize-winning roses. Oops. So, take your time, plan it out carefully, and for the love of all that is sacred, avoid any potential fire-fighting heroics. Nobody wants a burned-down house.And finally, my fellow techies, let's think ahead. I know it's tempting to focus on the here and now, but trust me on this – these won't be the last platforms you'll build. So, when designing your code, think about the future. Consider how to facilitate future migrations, because change is inevitable. And if there's one thing I've learned in my years as a tech comedian, it's that the only constant in this industry is change. That, and an unquenchable thirst for coffee.So, embrace the challenge of migrations, my friend. Laugh in the face of chaos and uncertainty. And remember, at the end of the day, it's all just a part of the never-ending journey of innovation. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to refactor my sock drawer. It's a delicate process, you know.
Why did the microservice go to a therapist? It had issues with composability! In all seriousness though, paying attention to microservice composability is crucial for successful development and use of microservices architecture. The composable service pattern emphasizes modular, independently deployable, self-contained services that work seamlessly together through well-defined APIs or protocols.
Why was the link afraid of getting too long? Because it might get lost in the URL-mighty forest! But with a dotnet-based URL shortening service like this one, you can save characters, track clicks, and make links more manageable.
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